Planning or attending a baby shower is a joyful event, full of love and excitement for the new arrival. Whether you’re the host or a guest, there are a few guidelines and tips to follow to ensure everything goes smoothly. Let’s explore the key aspects of baby shower planning, from timing and invitations to etiquette for hosts and guests.

When Should You Have a Baby Shower?

Traditionally, baby showers are held 4 to 6 weeks before the due date. This timing allows the parents-to-be enough time to organize gifts, prepare the nursery, and enjoy the celebration without worrying about going into labor early.

For second-time moms or those expecting multiples, some may choose to have a “sprinkle” or a smaller gathering closer to the due date, celebrating the new baby without the grandeur of a traditional first-time shower.

Who Should Host the Baby Shower?

While it used to be common for close friends or extended family to host baby showers (to avoid the appearance that the parents-to-be were asking for gifts), modern etiquette is more relaxed. Today, anyone close to the family—like a sister, best friend, or even a coworker—can host the shower.

It’s important to consider the mother-to-be's preferences when planning the event. Some may prefer a large gathering, while others might feel more comfortable with a smaller, intimate affair.

Planning the Baby Shower: Key Steps

1. Choose a Date and Location

The first step is to set a date and secure a location. Baby showers are often held at someone’s home, but they can also be hosted at a restaurant, park, or community center. Consider the season and any possible travel restrictions for family and friends.

2. Create a Guest List

Work with the parents-to-be to create the guest list. Be sure to include close family members, friends, and possibly coworkers or neighbors. Some parents may prefer a co-ed shower that includes dads and male friends, while others might opt for a more traditional all-female guest list.

3. Send Invitations

Send out invitations 4-6 weeks before the shower to give guests plenty of time to RSVP. Invitations can be physical cards, online invites, or even a combination of both. Include key information, such as the date, time, location, and registry details. If the event has a specific theme or requests, such as no gifts, be sure to note that as well.

4. Pick a Theme (Optional)

• Nursery rhyme themes like "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star"
• Seasonal themes (spring, fall, winter wonderland)
• Gender reveal (if the parents-to-be are sharing the baby’s gender)
• Animal or safari themes

The theme can carry through the decorations, cake, and even the games, adding a memorable touch to the event.

5. Plan the Menu

The menu should reflect the time of day and type of event. If the shower is brunch, consider offering pastries, quiches, and fruit. For an afternoon event, a light lunch or snacks like finger sandwiches, salads, and cupcakes work well. If possible, consider any dietary restrictions of the guests or the parents-to-be.

6. Organize Games and Activities

• Baby name bingo
• Guess the baby food (tasting different pureed foods)
• Diaper raffle (guests bring a pack of diapers to be entered into a raffle)
• Advice cards (guests offer parenting advice for the parents-to-be)

Make sure to keep the games short and enjoyable. It’s important not to overwhelm the event with too many activities.

Baby Shower Etiquette for Guests

RSVP on Time

It’s important to respond to the invitation as soon as possible. If you can’t attend, let the host know so they can plan accordingly. RSVP deadlines help the host get an accurate count for food and seating.

Bring a Gift

Even if the invitation says “no gifts,” it’s still customary to bring a small token of celebration, like a book for the baby, diapers, or a handmade item. Check the baby registry for ideas or ask the host if you need guidance on what the parents-to-be might appreciate.

Dress Appropriately

There’s no formal dress code for baby showers, but aim for casual and festive attire. Think of it as a nice brunch or tea party—something cheerful yet comfortable.

Baby Shower Etiquette for Hosts

Respect the Mother-to-Be's Preferences

Check in with the guest of honor before making major decisions. While surprises can be fun, it’s crucial that the mother-to-be is comfortable with the theme, guest list, and event style.

Manage the Gift-Opening Time

Traditionally, baby showers include a designated time for the mother-to-be to open gifts. However, some parents might feel uncomfortable with this, preferring to open gifts privately after the event. Ask the mom-to-be her preference ahead of time, and if gifts are opened during the shower, consider keeping it brief to avoid guest fatigue.

Make Sure Everyone Feels Welcome

As a host, your role is to create a warm and welcoming environment. Greet guests as they arrive, introduce people who may not know each other, and make sure everyone feels comfortable. Consider putting together goody bags as a thank-you for attending, filled with small items like candles, chocolates, or bath products.

Virtual Baby Showers

Due to the rise of remote gatherings, many baby showers are now held virtually. A virtual shower can be just as fun and memorable with a few adjustments. Consider sending guests baby shower boxes with treats, decorations, or game materials beforehand, and organize the event through a platform like Zoom.

Baby showers are a wonderful way to celebrate the upcoming arrival of a new baby and offer support to the parents-to-be. Whether you’re hosting or attending, a little planning and following simple etiquette rules can ensure the day is enjoyable and meaningful for everyone involved.